Living or Pancakes

Yesterday at the Dallas Acts 29 Bootcamp, my table leader and amazing church planting mentor, Chuck Land, gave a marvelous talk about hiding.  Darrin Patrick talked (via video) about men who are still living at home at 35 playing video games, hiding from maturity, manhood, and self-disclosure.

Honestly, in the past, I could have put myself squarely in that camp, however, through recent events in life, the Lord has placed genuine gospel-friends who are standing with me like soldiers in a fight, and the fight is for humans souls (mine included).  I am no longer hiding.  I want to take the time to encourage anyone reading this to come out and be exposed to people, be vulnerable, be known.  There is no hope in the darkness, and so come into the light, and trust in he who is Light.

And by the way, it is no shock to the Lord who you are, he already knows.  So, why run away?  Why not run to him?  Do not let hiding rot your bones, damper your spirit, cloud your witness, and quench your ministry.  The stakes are too high.

I was reading a book recently about living a more holy life.  In that book, the author was trying to illustrate that the cost of denial here is worth trading for the eternal pleasures of heaven.  Although, I cannot entirely disagree with that (Jesus endured the cross because of the joy set before him), I think the concept of the pleasure of heaven is a little misguided.

Let’s not forget the ultimate outcome of ourselves – we will be raised.  The resurrection of Jesus (the reason we will gather and worship today) is an historical reality that serves as a deposit of our own resurrection.  Our hope is in the resurrection, our aim is to be raised to glory with him, when he returns the dead will be raised to be judged by the lamb that was slain.  All these things concern the resurrection.  All will be raised – either to glory and vindication with the Son or to eternal judgment and vindication for the Son.

There is more ink in the New Testament dedicated to resurrection than ‘the after life’ of heaven to which we culturally seem to cling.  Our hope in being born again, saved from sin, elected by God, predestined to be conformed to his son, ransomed from sin, transferred into his kingdom of marvelous light, and ultimate restoration, is not a disembodied floating ghost on a cloud.  The reality and promise is of new glorified bodies, resurrected in power, to reign with Christ, and be raised from the dead as he is risen.  New, immortal, sinless, non-aging, God-glorifying corporeal selves.

It is resurrection Sunday – let’s not forget.

There are many times that I feel completely alone and that you have abandoned me.  I am not sure if this is brought on by my sin or feeling the weight of the world around me begging for total restoration.  I can pray, and you seem so far; read, but it does not feel like your voice.

This abandoned feeling needs to be remedied, because I know in my bones you are here.  You are showing yourself even in these words.  Please forget my sin which keeps me from you.  Restore me and clean me up so as to be your lovely again.  There is nothing I want more than to finally, at last see your face.

In that moment, I hope to be truly like you, resurrected, restored, and heir of glory.  I want to see your eyes. What do your ears look like?  When you smile, does your upper lip contract, which wrinkles are formed, and do you have dimples?  How tall are you, how long is your hair, what is your shoe size?  What are you like? The terror of life without you is wrenching, and I cannot wait to see you.

Maybe today, finally today, you will show up and finally make all things new.  Rescue me from this body of death, wrap me in your arms, and let me delight in you fully.

I need more of you, want more of you, and you must be the one to provide it.  Cleanse me from these lustful eyes, this deceitful heart, this bent mind.  Bring me near to you again, and allow my pleasure to be in you.

Maranatha – come quickly Lord Jesus.

I have been working on a project that tries to put the book of Genesis in simple terms and brushes back the misconceptions as well as assumptions many in evangelical life make about this book.  I have found Genesis to be precious to me, and those closest to me are enamored with it all the time.

Genesis has a cloud of mystery because of its context.  The ancient near east is a mystery and foreign world to many modern western people.  This should not be a surprise as the cultures, literature, life style, language, and world views are alien to both sets of people.  If an ancient near eastern bedouin dropped into 2011 Los Angeles, it would be an odd site for the bedouin, just as it would for a Los Angelino to set foot into the world of Sumer.

At this stage, I would like to take one chapter at a time, and post the first editions of the work.  These are not final drafts are worthy of publishing, but need to have a medium of writing out the thoughts I have on Genesis and see if feedback comes my way.

Vah yomer elohim ya he orr, vah ya he orr (And God said, let there be light, and there was light Genesis 1.3)

Many people who follow me on twitter have asked what the translation is of my description – which is written in Latin.  The quote is, “Homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto” and it comes from Publius Terence Afer who lived in the second century CE in the Roman Empire.  The translation is, “I am a man, there is nothing human foreign to me”, and I believe this.

In the past few weeks, my life have been in turmoil and despair at times with my recent loss of my job over inappropriate Christ-demeaning behavior.  I am a man and there is nothing human that is foreign to me.  I have been ruthless in ambition, entitled in my attitude, lustful with my eyes, and lying with my tongue.  In all this the Lord has grabbed me in all his gracious might to make me his again.  I have had nothing but time on my hands to reflect and examine where and how I have fallen so far from the life I used to live which was wholly devoted to the Lord I love.

Recently reading through Romans 6, I was trying to internalize it and begin to remember the sin that entangles is no passive agent.  Sin is a slave master and monster hoping and seeking to devour all men.  The word ‘sin’ described first in the Bible was to Cain, and it was a noun.  That means sin is a some-thing not a some-act.

Sin is not this thing I do (although it can be), rather sin is something I AM.  It is something that enslaves, captures, and holds to conform to its will and likeness.  It will hold so long that I would mirror it.  Lust came along, so I became lustful; Pride turned me to proud, Arrogance turned me into arrogant.  Throughout the Bible, the subject of sin is something to kill, and therefore is an object with life, not an unfortunate behavioral outcome.

So the other afternoon, my wife was not at home and the urge for sin (lust in particular) came creeping in the door.  All alone, completely unable to be found guilty of any wrong doing, so the thoughts went. I looked at my iPad, and the URL was only a click away.  I am stressed anyway, and I need a release. That bastard came walking right into my house with these lies.  The door was unlocked and not only that, there was a sign out front that said, “Open House, Today Until the Wife Comes Home” ushering sin it into my heart and mind.  This devastating monster strides in, full of his pride to make me bend to his will again.  My guard being sullen and limp, that beast came for a quick kill and exile me back to his slave quarters.  And there, in that moment, the fiend was slashed.

Romans 6 came flooding to mind. “Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions…But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness”(Romans 6.12, 17-18).

I am not the property of that lying wretch any longer.  I am not his slave, and not only that, I am within my full rights to exact wrath on him in the form of slaying him with brutal precision.  His throat was bloodied from the first blow, but still heaving a breath in an effort to stay alive, his feet had to be cut from under him.  I jousted, and bottom-up he went.  Now laying there in agony, the assurance that he was not welcome was gripping him now, but it was not enough to ask him to remove himself from my home.  He had to die, then and there.  Stepping on his lacerated neck and drawing the bloodied blade, and coming down on him with the force of the king of all creation, in that moment he was killed.  He did not get up and walk again.

His minions will return, but thanks be to the father, the Christ who loves me, and his abiding spirit I have not felt victory like that one in a long time.  I have been succumbing to sin with ease the past 18 months or so.  However, I am no longer his slave, and it wasn’t until pouring back into scripture that that truth became real to me again.  My advice, READ THE WORD so that you may be kept from sin.  Meditate on his word, his gospel, his truth, for in those moments you are sharpening the arsenal and the vacuum of the mind is filled with holy things, good things, precious things, enduring things, Christ things.

The first question of the Heidelburg Catechism is:

What is your only hope in life and in death?

The answer:

That I with body and soul, both in life and death, am not my own, but belong unto my faithful Saviour Jesus Christ

To him be all glory, and honor, and praise, and dominion, and power forever and ever Amen.